Punishment or Relationship Building

It's that time of yeah again where tempers rise, behavior increases, and we are starting my to feel the effects of being cooped up right before Winter Break.  One thing I figured out a couple years into my career was that detention needs to be looked at not only as a punisent, but rather as an opportunity.

In the educational system I grew up in and many of you did as well, detention was handed out for many different reasons, parents were notified, and life became frustrating at school and home.  Many times detention was served with someone else and used as a loss of time.  This is where I decided to change things and be selfish.

I decided that I would make sure that when I assigned a student a lunch detention or after school detention, they had to serve it in my room, with me present.  I then ensured that the time was meaningful to not only talk about the behavior, bit also to build my relationship with the student.  I got to know them for who they were.  Learning more about thei hobbies and family.  

I found that although this didn't minimize the punative side of detention, it also paid huge dividends.  Some of the students that have me the largest run for my money in class, became my biggest advocates.  Some actually started stopping by on their own time to say hello throughout the day.  Believe it or not, their behavioral choices actually became personal.  They no longer viewed the impact of behavior on the class, but through the impact of the lens of their trust and relationship with me as their teacher.  

Not every student changed their attitude, but most saw change for the positive.  I challenge you to make behavior personal for students.  Give them your best by giving them the true attention they are seeking.  Sometimes a student is challenging you simply to see how much you truly care.